Pearls of wisdom to my 14 year old self and 14 year old daughter

Our daughter celebrates her 14th birthday today.  Bizarrely, both myself and Mr eKuiLibriuM remember being 14 ourselves,  it does not feel that long ago… but young Miss, I am sure does not believe that for a second!  It got me thinking about what I would tell my 14 year old self today, right now.   Here are my 14 pearls of wisdom written to my 14 year old self and now 14 year old Miss!

1. Live for today; it is gift as it is in the present.
It is far too easy to be idly thinking about everything that is going to happen and not to focus on what it is that you are experiencing now.

2. You can, and must, say No!
Having the courage to say no respectfully shows that you have the courage of your beliefs.  Saying No, vocally and strongly, in a situation that you know is wrong and will compromise your personal values and integrity is essential.  You have a whole life to be loved forever.

3. Respect is earnt.
Earning respect and be given respect is a direct testament that people have confidence in your beliefs, qualities and ideas.  Politeness and manners lead people towards respect.

4. Life is too short to sulk!
The sky is blue behind the clouds!  The only person that is being hurt when you sulk is yourself and it is wasted energy.  It also takes more muscles to create a frown than a smile!

5. Your history is made everyday.
Aiming to leave a permanent, genuine, purposeful ‘map’ in the files of history is to be commended.  You will be remembered for what you did, not what you did not do.

6. Lying is never acceptable

7. It is not all about ‘me’.
Caring about others in the world, friends, relatives, animals, the world itself, allows you to blossom into the adult that will make a real difference in life for themselves and others.

8. The world is there for the taking!
Look beyond your front garden.  Seize opportunities and enjoy the rollercoaster ride that comes with them.  Always say thank you.

9. Treat others as you wish to be treated.
Common sense really.  Don’t be the one that is talked about for the wrong reasons.

10. Laughter is the best medicine.
That, and good sleep, nice food and regular exercise.  You only get one body so look after it and make the crows’ feet at the corner of your eyes count when you hit your 40’s!

11. School is cool!
It is the longest part of your life where you are guided and nurtured.  It’s time to embrace every element of school life and to remember that working hard now will allow you to make the biggest and best choices later in life.

12. Responsibilities are an essential part of life.
From making your bed, to earning a few pounds babysitting, up to your first part time job, via looking after a relative, taking the dog for a walk, or simply knuckling down to do your homework.  These are the simple things that will help you to learn now how to manage life to its fullest.

13. You get nothing if you do nothing…
Hoping for divine intervention, or a lottery win, certainly won’t give you the opportunities to experience life to its fullest.  Learn, live, laugh – and eventually love!

14. Mum and Dad really do, ‘get it’!
The generation gap is smaller than ever.  A problem shared is a problem halved and help is always there, even if life feels really scary.

I was chatting to a client today about this and he threw a 15th pearl in – for every teenager out there!

15. Don’t eat yellow snow!

"They helped me set realistic goals, with challenging yet achievable milestones" Susanne

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